Im so clever

Super strength?

Just Saying

Conchord: 2 stars

Bret and Jemaine

More Dumpage

Ryan Stiles

Dump

Come with us. The cookies are warm and chocolately. mmmmmm

Drinking, drinking, drinking, Thinking

self portrait of sorts

WIP

Work in progress. Just trying stuff . . .

I worked at Cedar Point for a summer in 2008, and this is why I will never ride a roller coaster again.

Really, I have always been hesitant to get into a rampaging car of death, one which I have no control over and have no idea what destination I will be attending, and I think that this accurately describes a roller coaster.

I was a caricature artist in 2008 and one of the stands that I worked at was twenty feet from the Top Thrill Dragster. This is the fastest, tallest coaster in the WORLD!!! (at least it was until some nutbag from Jersey built one ten feet taller, wtf?) Dragster had a unique set up to it. The fact that it shoots off at 125mph, the train has to be weighed every time in order to know how much awesome was needed to propel it forward. I don't really know how it works obviously, but I do know that it goes from 0 - 125 in four seconds. This coaster wouldn't always make it to the top of the hill. This was also a problem for a coaster called The Wildcat.

The Wildcat was one of the few kid friendly coasters at Cedar Point, as in it didn't have any crazy turns or loops. Many families use this coaster to introduce their little kids to the idea of attaching yourself to a careening vehicle of death is a good idea.

The Wildcat is also one of the coasters that has two cars running opposite each other. This summer day there was a dude that was HUGE getting into the car. Along with his even HUGER wife and 2.5 chub of a kid. Needless to say, the fat to metal ratio was 1:1. The car was busting at the seams as it slowly pulls its self to the tippy top of the hill and starts to careen back down thanks to gravity.

As the odd mixture of blubber and coaster succumb to gravity and begin to twist and turn, a second coaster car is set off. This car is filled with people still resembling human. This second car is having fun, as is the first. The problem arises when the first car tries to take a slight incline. The car can't make it, being weighed downed by what can only be described as the Moon, and it starts to roll backward. Flub flapping everywhere.

The second car, that has already begun its own adventure, is unable to stop because, as we already discussed, is unable to write its own fate.

Inevitably, the second car crashes into the fist as it swings back down the hill. There is a crash, boom, screeching of metal, and everybody is mildly injured and able to walk away from the accident.

And that is why I won't ride a roller coaster.

So I recently found out that blogs can also be used for words. Go figure. So I decided that I would try my hand at laying it all out there and see what comes back to me.

I figure the best way to start is to tell you about me. Maybe everything, maybe not, I'm making this up as I go.

I was born in March. I have blue eyes and red hair. I love the fact that I am left handed. I love that I have freckles. I love that all these things make me look Irish, even though I am Italian. Its a great conversation starter.

Sometimes I feel that I am quite nomadic. Other times, I feel so tied down to things. Money seems to always be on my mind and I hate that fact.

I wish I had bigger hands, just because mine are abnormally small.

Many people compare me to Conan O'Brien just because of my hair. I secretly wish that they would say that I am as funny as he.

I recently bought a bike, and this may be the most exciting thing that I will do this summer.

My friends recently had a birthday party and I was reminded of how much I love and miss all of them. How many people would appreciate a Tri-force cake? Not many, and yet everybody there did. And that makes a night filled with awesomesauce.

When I was little I went to a therapist and hated it. It was then that I decided that I would figure the tough stuff out myself: this turned into me talking to myself consistently and I am fine with this.

What does this all mean? Probably nothing really. How many people are remembered long after their gone? Just a handful compared to how many there were. I figure that the best thing to do is: do what you want to do. Do what makes me happy. Do what makes you happy. If It doesn't hurt me, I don't care. All we can do is live for today, and make it count. Who needs a bike? Who needs the voices in their head? Who needs to make up words like awesomesauce? The only problem is that the answers to these questions are what make us individuals, and what will make it more likely that we will be remembered. And that's what we all want right?

HEY EVERYBODY!

Don't worry, I'm still alive.

I did this caricature for a friend of a friend who has a daughter that had a cat that once decided to not eat this mouse that ended up becoming the new king of England. Yeah. I had to take a picture so its a little rough, but still understandable. :D



and just a reference point, here is a picture of her.



Thanks for keeping me alive.

xoxo Allison

its been awhile

And here is . . . fan art? I dont know, damn.
Hellboy. Kick your ass.

LEns FlarE!

This will be the only time that I will use a lens flare on a project. I thought that the level of cheese is comparable, so the flare was alright. Anyway, this is my final, a poster for MAR Con, Multiple Alternate Realities Convention. I just smashed together Star Trek and Wars and this is what I came up with. Any crits would be appreciated and thought about before thrown away. Thanks

More Wippyness!!

Some progress . . . any crits?

Wippy WIP

just another wip

Abe eatin'

my first speed paint?

This took about an hour. With ref. I think this looks like John Goodman. Anyway, check it out.

another finished piece

baseball!!

Duke Doomsday: Dinosaur fighter

More Junk

I think I'll call this one done.

Another one

Woody Allen!!

Funny Comp

I was bored and decided to color an old sketch of mine. Abbot and Costello.

And then there was one . . .

An illustration to go along with the whole smorgasbord. Enjoy!

Anybody wanna buy a shirt maybe?

I think these shirts are the Spiffy-ist. Yeah, that's right, I went there.

Some more Scinanigans . . .

These are some designs for the Darwin Awards book(s?) . So anyway, I think that these are pretty much finished, but I would love any feed back that is floating around in the ether. Thanks for taking the time to check out my stuff!

And the black and white one

and the black and white one. I know its missing a leg, but what else is wrong?

Postcard WIp

Here is my first promotional postcard ever. Any crit would be welcome.

Down and Dirty Portrait Bonanza

Getting the oil changed in Black Thunder and there was this little kid. Her mom asked if I could draw her (more out of competition that anything) and I said I would try. This is the second time I drew it, the first drawing now in possession of the mom. Another victory for the art world. Hu-zzah!

sketch dump infinity

stuff I've been working on. See Brad Pitt? Next project time

The Big Jawed Lebowski

A class project: I had to choose two movies from a list and make a poster for the child poster. I chose The Big Lebowski and Jaws. Together they form The Big Jawed Lebowski. I had to do everything in my power to not make a Jay Leno joke. Any crit would be welcome.

Death From Above 1979

A poster or cd cover or something like that. But yeah, . . . does not match their type of music. I still like it.

word generator

I've decided that I am tired of being picked over for sketch blogs. So, as well as a show case for my super cool art, I'm going to post random generated words and will sketch from those. We will see how this goes. . . First words: Blackboard Enlightenment. Take that boys!! Sketches soon. 

Posing, posing with my arm, Posing, posing with my leg

Posing a threat! Line drawing of a gig poster I'm working on. Color to follow soon!

Some more stuff to chew your teeth on

color version of speedcock. :)

Character design for Glick. I call it, Speedcock.

this was for a baby shower invitation that I was commissioned to do. The final product had the top of her head.

Older paintings

 "elf Girl"
 "Butt"
 "Ho hum . . ."

Portrait paintings

 "savages"
 clsoe up
 "Steve Bushemi's daughter"
 "Bob"

painting

James. Mister McBuff Buff. A painting I did last semester with Ernie.